We sure do like to "do" stuff, don't we?
We invest in courses, books, programs, and degrees that teach us how we can "do" this, or how we can "do" that...
We pour ourselves into our work, and call it "doing our job"...
We focus on our "outreach"; we worry if our "missions" are effective enough...
We continually add to our to-do lists, whether personally or corporately motivated to do so, hoping for the shallow satisfactions of feeling productive.
And if we're not "doing" something, we're plagued by guilt.
(I'm not immune to this. It's Friday at 2pm. I'm still in my pajamas, totally throwing my to-do list in the air.)
The social atmosphere of today, at least all of it that I'm exposed to, is one of action; be it socially-, mission-, career- or goal-oriented. We're surrounded by this mentality, and taught this from a young age. This has been modeled for us, and this is what we're modeling for our children.
In our rush to "do" more, our self worth becomes identified by what we DO, instead of who we ARE.
How ironic, today being Good Friday, that Jesus cried out for us, "Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do."
We look at the Scriptures to see that Jesus met the needs of the people He encountered. We're so quick to jump on board with this, because this is something tangible that we can accomplish. This is what our performance-trained brains, as well as the passing paradigm, tell us.
The gospel accounts tell of Jesus feeding the crowds with the loaves and fish.
Yes, Jesus fed thousands of people.
Want to know what he did next?
HE LEFT!! (He didn't sit around, telling the people to keep coming back so he could supply their basic needs over and over again, calling that one thing he did his ministry.)
Matthew and Mark's accounts say that he jumped on a boat with the disciples and hi-tailed it out of there. Luke's account doesn't say he left, but the loaves-and-fish account is followed by the sentence, "Once when Jesus was praying by himself..." (- my guess? He left.) John's account also tells that Jesus left the scene.
Why do we overlook that???
Probably because it's easier to follow the expectation to "do as Jesus did", instead of finding out why, or what happened next.
Probably because we come from a society that compartmentalizes, breaking things into easily digestible nuggets - (it's easier to memorize that way.)
What we fail to pay attention to, is that Jesus did everything He did for two reasons:
1)He knew who he was.
2)He only did what he saw his father doing.
It wasn't to make himself look or feel good.
It wasn't to model a new kind of ministry.
It wasn't to shock and awe people with something that went against the very grain of society (even though it very much did).
Jesus did all these things to shine the light of a new reality into the darkness of life for people bound by religion.
I really want to tear into the fish and bread story, but I'll give my cliff-notes.
(I will tell you that I see a lot of Jesus rolling his eyes, in all four accounts.)
Jesus knew who He was, and was listening to God.
What is God all about? Community. (I would think 5000 people could be a community; a big one, but a community never the less.)
What else is God about? Provision. Love.
I find it fascinating that it was a child who had the fish and bread. And that this child had something the community needed. And he gave it. (That's my take; I really don't think he'd be mentioned in scripture if he put up a big stink about someone taking his food...)
Anyways, this kid gives up what he has, because the community needs it.
And it's enough. It's more than enough.
What if the story of Jesus feeding the 5000 was a model of community, instead a model of ministry?
We're so quick to "do what Jesus did", when we don't even fully understand what he did, why he did it, and what that meant to the people around him. Not to mention that so many of us wander around not knowing who we are, trying out different avenues of activity or "doing" all kinds of stuff, thinking it will tell us who we are, trying to apply to our lives lessons that don't make any sense because the setting was different.
A couple years ago I heard a pastor from overseas say that we Americans work ourselves into [forced] rest. I agree. We run the cycle of doing and doing and doing until we crash, spent and exhausted, with no fulfillment; so as soon as we're able, we get right back out there and do it all over again.
Talk about going around the mountain!
What if the priority was changed from "doing" to "being"?
If all we're focusing on as the church is teaching how to do, without teaching us how to be, then we're just "doing church", instead of "being the church".
We can't "be the church" if we don't know how to "be", how to abide.
And we can't know how to "be" if we don't know who we "are".
In order to know who we "are", Christ only asks that we do one thing. That IS one thing he modeled, and we celebrate/remember it today.
All the years of hearing that I was created for a purpose, that I was loved, that I was forgiven, didn't tell me who I was. In a sweeping moment of clarity, all that did for me was let me know that every bit of my screw ups in my past had a reason, all that I had done wrong in my entire life was to be learned from, not lived in.
I tried for years to do this, and tried to do that, hoping that I'd understand who I was. (See above in the working to exhaustion bit.)
It's funny, looking back, I can see that I had to understand that my past did not tell me who I am today.
That person I thought I was, I had to kill; I had to crucify all my selfish wants, wishes, desires, my pride, and even my dreams.
Of everything I wanted, I wanted God more.
It was only then, by hanging myself on the cross, that I really live, and continue to learn who I am, and all the fullness of that.
Psalm 46:10
"Be still and know that I am God."
Be still and know that I am.
Be still and know.
Be still.
BE.
Friday, April 18, 2014
Friday, April 11, 2014
Decisions, decisions. ..
Disclaimer: I'm writing this in response to some stuff that has happened in my life, and the people around me. There is a specific audience. If you are wondering if it's you, then it's not you. It is in no way complete, or absolute, or the only way to handle situations. If it doesn't apply to you, or even make sense, then, dear reader, chalk it up as the writings of some other yahoo on the internet, and move on.
Our lives are based on, & the result of, the decisions we make. Sure, we all have to deal with the effects of other people's decisions as well, but for the most part, our life is what we make it.
Every moment is ripe with the opportunity to learn from the situations we're in; to either learn not to make that same decision again, or we can choose to make better choices for our lives.
Some of us pick up on this dynamic early in our lives, while other people have to go around the mountain over & over again. (Aaaaand over and over and over again...)
[Rabbit trail. What, or WHO, is the mountain? Sorry. Shiny things.]
We all come to pivotal moments in our lives, where we have to make a decision to change things. If you're at one of those moments/days/weeks/months in your life, this little list may help you assess some things. Or maybe it won't. Either way, do with it what you have to.
If you find yourself in a situation that seems vaguely familiar, or even if it's the downright same, you have to ask yourself some questions.
(Take this as a sort-of self-assessment.)
1. What was my response to this situation last time I encountered it?
2. Will I be making the same decision again?
3. What brought me to this situation?
4. If I make the same decision this time, as I did last time, what am I expecting to be different?
5. If I make the same decisions as I did in the past, why should the situation turn out differently this time?
6. What did I learn, or not learn, the last time I was in this situation?
7. Who am I seeking counsel from? Do I have someone that I trust enough to keep me accountable through the decision-making process? Am I being completely honest with them, so they can help me in the best way possible? And, am I listening to them?
8. Am I a different person now, compared to the last time you were in this situation?
- If so, how?
It's always helped me to move into the next stage of life by understanding what brought me to that stage, as well as keeping a firm hold on the lessons I've learned along the way - to be read "applying them".
Hope this helps... someone.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
The Last Day
I left my job today.
Venturing out of a life of security, stepping into a decision of faith.
It's funny; the last couple days have been a whirlwind of people's shock, tying up loose ends for my replacement, and an overflowing out pour of what I probably least expected: love.
********
I never in a million years would have thought that I would end up working in a manufacturing plant.
My military career was pretty much spent outdoors in the maintenance world, and I guess that's the way my mind was geared.
On top of that, years of hearing stories of my mother-in-law's experience working in an Ohio factory made me cringe at the possibility of that line of work.
So when God threw the opportunity at me, I stepped up to the plate, and took a swing. My excitement of being in the game distracted me enough, that it was my first day at work before I realized that here I was, somewhere I never thought I'd be. I found myself back in maintenance to my (surprising) delight, surrounded by the people I am most familiar with. The hardworking, knuckle- and ball-busting people who are usually the least appreciated, but so very crucial to the very operation and success of the organization they belong to. The mushrooms - kept in the dark, and fed crap, yet still grow and thrive. Their positions demand innovation, as they are the ones who have to do more with less, as the business culture of today expects this without words.
Theirs is a world I am painfully aware of, from the inside.
It was that moment that I decided that I'd be who I am really am there. Happy. Positive. Corny-funny. Optimistic. Someone who offers a different perspective. I wanted to be a source of joy, a person who exuded peace, & an inkling of hope in a place that I had mistaken for a dirty, monotonous place. I wanted to take my familiarity with their world, and inject my skills, strengths, personality and perspective into my job, hopefully, naively wanting to make their jobs easier / better, as my position was one of vision and planning.
*********
I am quickly reminded of why I took the job in the first place... the people.
I love people.
I love being around people.
Experiences, stories, & perspectives of everyone around me is what delights me.
I love seeing how relationships and friendships develop and grow when the perspective of myself being the center of my universe is removed.
One of the things that's so important to me is encouraging people, to let them know their value. Even as I write this, I realize how many times I failed; how many opportunities I missed.
There's so many people I would pass by daily, who's names I never learned, who's smiles I'll never forget. They are etched on my heart forever.
The people I worked with made this job an amazing experience. Caring people. Humble people. Grace-full people. Selfless people. Hardworking people. Faithful people. Hilarious people. Dedicated people. Frustrated people.
Amazing people.
Working with various people throughout the plant, learning people's strengths, their humility in admitting their weaknesses, hearing their ideas, seeing their seemingly un-reciprocated devotion, I can see how I've been surrounded by a large group of people who's potential remains unknown, and therefore untapped.
If the worth of a company was measured solely by the people who worked at that company, that company would be world-renowned, and people from all over the world would be fighting to get in the doors.
********
The people I was lucky enough to work with every day - my life is richer now because of them. Friendships that will stand the test of time have been forged in that place, and for that reason, every one of the bad days, and every bit of the frustration was worth it.
Selfishly, I'll admit, my goal was to work there, and in the meantime, affect someone's life.
It turns out, they have all affected mine.
Venturing out of a life of security, stepping into a decision of faith.
It's funny; the last couple days have been a whirlwind of people's shock, tying up loose ends for my replacement, and an overflowing out pour of what I probably least expected: love.
********
I never in a million years would have thought that I would end up working in a manufacturing plant.
My military career was pretty much spent outdoors in the maintenance world, and I guess that's the way my mind was geared.
On top of that, years of hearing stories of my mother-in-law's experience working in an Ohio factory made me cringe at the possibility of that line of work.
So when God threw the opportunity at me, I stepped up to the plate, and took a swing. My excitement of being in the game distracted me enough, that it was my first day at work before I realized that here I was, somewhere I never thought I'd be. I found myself back in maintenance to my (surprising) delight, surrounded by the people I am most familiar with. The hardworking, knuckle- and ball-busting people who are usually the least appreciated, but so very crucial to the very operation and success of the organization they belong to. The mushrooms - kept in the dark, and fed crap, yet still grow and thrive. Their positions demand innovation, as they are the ones who have to do more with less, as the business culture of today expects this without words.
Theirs is a world I am painfully aware of, from the inside.
It was that moment that I decided that I'd be who I am really am there. Happy. Positive. Corny-funny. Optimistic. Someone who offers a different perspective. I wanted to be a source of joy, a person who exuded peace, & an inkling of hope in a place that I had mistaken for a dirty, monotonous place. I wanted to take my familiarity with their world, and inject my skills, strengths, personality and perspective into my job, hopefully, naively wanting to make their jobs easier / better, as my position was one of vision and planning.
*********
I am quickly reminded of why I took the job in the first place... the people.
I love people.
I love being around people.
Experiences, stories, & perspectives of everyone around me is what delights me.
I love seeing how relationships and friendships develop and grow when the perspective of myself being the center of my universe is removed.
One of the things that's so important to me is encouraging people, to let them know their value. Even as I write this, I realize how many times I failed; how many opportunities I missed.
There's so many people I would pass by daily, who's names I never learned, who's smiles I'll never forget. They are etched on my heart forever.
The people I worked with made this job an amazing experience. Caring people. Humble people. Grace-full people. Selfless people. Hardworking people. Faithful people. Hilarious people. Dedicated people. Frustrated people.
Amazing people.
Working with various people throughout the plant, learning people's strengths, their humility in admitting their weaknesses, hearing their ideas, seeing their seemingly un-reciprocated devotion, I can see how I've been surrounded by a large group of people who's potential remains unknown, and therefore untapped.
If the worth of a company was measured solely by the people who worked at that company, that company would be world-renowned, and people from all over the world would be fighting to get in the doors.
********
The people I was lucky enough to work with every day - my life is richer now because of them. Friendships that will stand the test of time have been forged in that place, and for that reason, every one of the bad days, and every bit of the frustration was worth it.
Selfishly, I'll admit, my goal was to work there, and in the meantime, affect someone's life.
It turns out, they have all affected mine.
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
No Different Than Anyone Else
The last week or so I've been burdened by thoughts, words, stuff I've felt I've needed to share, but haven't had the time to sit down and pound out on the computer.
I think in my frustration of not being able to write, on top of a timeline that's dwindling before my husband starts his new job, well, yesterday SUCKED.
I got home and turned off my phone. I dashed around the house like a crazy lady, notebook in hand, adding to the list of things that needed to get done before his departure for the new job (in less than a week).
**Mind you, when I'm in this mode, absolutely N O T H I N G gets done.
To make myself sound sane to others, I call this my "organization mode", when in actuality, it is my "panic mode".
Sunday? Wonderful. Normal. Had a blast. (Other than not being able to write...)
Monday? Deep end. Full-blown clinically insane. No ability whatsoever to come up with a coherent thought. Couldn't make sense of my emotions, and why they were all bombarding me at once.
Tuesday? Still reeling from Monday's onslaught, just quietly. On my way in to work this morning, I asked God (quite to the point,) what the hell was going on, why I was acting / reacting the way I was.
He still answers my prayers with the unexpected.
One word: Community.
He brought back to me all the different times I've told people what they need is community. How "community" has been at the forefront of my thoughts, my writing, my sharing, my experiences, my life.
He then, gently, reminded me that I'm not above the need for community.
That I'm not only supposed to be the one who bears every one's burdens, but to share my burdens as well.
It's when I shut down, and close myself off, that I need community the most.
See, I've been strong for so long. Part of who I am now has been shaped by who I've been in my past.
I've been taught my whole life to be strong, to be able to take care of myself, to be independent.
And I've finally come to peace with all that, to accept my weaknesses, build on my strengths, sharing both along the way.
I am learning that I talk about sharing my weaknesses with a whole lot of people, but I don't really share my weaknesses. (God, just thinking of doing so makes my chest tighten...)
Interestingly, now that I think about it, it's all contrary to community...
It's funny, God will make something I'm supposed to teach VERY personal before I share it...
So, community of people that I'm part of, (GeoffConnieMikeMelissaMikeyBobbyCathyElizabethGrahamAprilMichaelSuePaulPatrickBrittanyAnnaDon & so many more),
here I am. I have no idea where I'm at, or what I'm dealing with, but here's what's happening, so God can do whatever he's gonna do.
The hubby starts the new job this coming weekend.
For the first time in a long time, we'll be spending time apart.
Being apart isn't an issue, in fact, I've made jokes about it for the last couple months. Defense mechanism? Most likely. But it's nothing new. We were both military, so we all know the deal.
I'm totally cool with his new job. He'll get to travel, and at the right times, I'll be able to go with him.
I'm excited that he's following a dream and that this dream lines up with what God wants him to do. Nothing could excite me more.
I'm excited about the time opening up for me to spend time with the rest of the community, building and strengthening relationships.
I'm excited about the time opening up for me to write, to exercise, to eat healthy, to work on creative stuff.
What is scaring me?
I don't really know right at this moment. But when my vulnerability comes out, which I know it will, I just ask you be there. Because I'm going to need to lean on you all.
(right there... that was vulnerability. Quick! Someone write it down!)
I think in my frustration of not being able to write, on top of a timeline that's dwindling before my husband starts his new job, well, yesterday SUCKED.
I got home and turned off my phone. I dashed around the house like a crazy lady, notebook in hand, adding to the list of things that needed to get done before his departure for the new job (in less than a week).
**Mind you, when I'm in this mode, absolutely N O T H I N G gets done.
To make myself sound sane to others, I call this my "organization mode", when in actuality, it is my "panic mode".
Sunday? Wonderful. Normal. Had a blast. (Other than not being able to write...)
Monday? Deep end. Full-blown clinically insane. No ability whatsoever to come up with a coherent thought. Couldn't make sense of my emotions, and why they were all bombarding me at once.
Tuesday? Still reeling from Monday's onslaught, just quietly. On my way in to work this morning, I asked God (quite to the point,) what the hell was going on, why I was acting / reacting the way I was.
He still answers my prayers with the unexpected.
One word: Community.
He brought back to me all the different times I've told people what they need is community. How "community" has been at the forefront of my thoughts, my writing, my sharing, my experiences, my life.
He then, gently, reminded me that I'm not above the need for community.
That I'm not only supposed to be the one who bears every one's burdens, but to share my burdens as well.
It's when I shut down, and close myself off, that I need community the most.
See, I've been strong for so long. Part of who I am now has been shaped by who I've been in my past.
I've been taught my whole life to be strong, to be able to take care of myself, to be independent.
And I've finally come to peace with all that, to accept my weaknesses, build on my strengths, sharing both along the way.
I am learning that I talk about sharing my weaknesses with a whole lot of people, but I don't really share my weaknesses. (God, just thinking of doing so makes my chest tighten...)
Interestingly, now that I think about it, it's all contrary to community...
It's funny, God will make something I'm supposed to teach VERY personal before I share it...
So, community of people that I'm part of, (GeoffConnieMikeMelissaMikeyBobbyCathyElizabethGrahamAprilMichaelSuePaulPatrickBrittanyAnnaDon & so many more),
here I am. I have no idea where I'm at, or what I'm dealing with, but here's what's happening, so God can do whatever he's gonna do.
The hubby starts the new job this coming weekend.
For the first time in a long time, we'll be spending time apart.
Being apart isn't an issue, in fact, I've made jokes about it for the last couple months. Defense mechanism? Most likely. But it's nothing new. We were both military, so we all know the deal.
I'm totally cool with his new job. He'll get to travel, and at the right times, I'll be able to go with him.
I'm excited that he's following a dream and that this dream lines up with what God wants him to do. Nothing could excite me more.
I'm excited about the time opening up for me to spend time with the rest of the community, building and strengthening relationships.
I'm excited about the time opening up for me to write, to exercise, to eat healthy, to work on creative stuff.
What is scaring me?
I don't really know right at this moment. But when my vulnerability comes out, which I know it will, I just ask you be there. Because I'm going to need to lean on you all.
(right there... that was vulnerability. Quick! Someone write it down!)
Sunday, January 12, 2014
A Beautiful Hope
Today is a new day.
(Right at the beginning of a new year, I might add.)
For the last two weeks, I've been flooded from all sides with hope, with possibility, and with a vision for a future that looks so much brighter than I ever thought possible.
Even in the midst of rapid changes all around us, and the 'not-knowing-what's-shaking-out', I still sense an incredible hope.
My outlook on life causes me to embrace change, to almost look forward to it.
In order to survive the sometimes crushing strife that change can bring, I have to seek God.
Sometimes, when seeking Him, He gives me glimpses of what He's doing, in order to understand why things are happening the way they are. He broadens my perspective beyond my own little slice of existence.
Here we sit, it's after Christmas and into the new year.
We just celebrated the birth of our Savior. I'm still wrapping my head around all that entails, especially for today. In order to do that, I have to look at the Christmas story through my own eyes.
The prophets knew that the Messiah was coming. But it was only Mary and Joseph that knew the baby Mary carried was the Christ.
Imagine this, if you will:
The baby you carry is the prophesied and long awaited Messiah. The one destined to save Israel, as the religious leaders have taught for centuries. (Just like we teach the second coming of Christ today...)
This would normally be something celebrated, just as we celebrate the news of a new baby today.
But, there is a scandal. You have not yet married the man you're engaged to.
(And remember, pre-marital 'relations' in this culture could be a death sentence.)
So here you are, pregnant. Pregnant not by your husband, or even by your fiance, but pregnant by God.
(No one's going to believe this, as it is. But it gets better...)
And, to top it off, you're pregnant, and the child you carry is the Son of God! The one promised, the one long awaited by the entire nation.
And you can't tell a soul...
I can only imagine the conversations that Mary & Joseph have. You know, after that first awkward one...
They knew the teachings, they know that things were going to be different from then on out. But I don't think they had any idea what that would look like.
I'm sure that during her pregnancy Mary and Joseph, if they were anything like any other couple expecting a child, they were filled with hopes and dreams already.
The hope that a child brings is endless. The faith that takes over when a pregnancy occurs is often unnoticed, but it is the fuel for visions of the future, and the endless, endless possibilities.
Now, add on to those hopes and dreams, the knowledge that your child is the Christ-child. The Messiah. The one to save your nation.
We all dream greatness for our children, don't we. But to know? That would fuel all kinds of fantastic dreams, wouldn't it?
So the baby comes.
For those who've had children, it's never at a convenient time, is it? (I remember when my mom went into labor with my brother, our entire family was camping... Two hours away from the hospital.)
Mary and Joseph aren't at home, thanks to the census; they end up in the only shelter they can find, so she can deliver the baby. Not a hospital, not a doctor or midwife's office. Not even a hotel. Scripture puts them in a barn; a shepherd's shelter.
A barn doesn't even sound that far-fetched, because we think of the barns we've seen our entire lives.
In all actuality, the shelter the holy family ended up in was a cave, a rocky cutout on the side of a hill.
Everything about this story leads me to believe that nothing about this was turning out as Mary and Joseph planned, or expected.
I wonder if they paid that any mind.
As the life of Jesus progresses, we see more and more of the unexpected.
Who would've thought that this baby, God-with-us, would shatter the barriers between clean and unclean right out of the gate (or womb, if you will), and that the first ones to come worship Him were the very ones that the Jewish religion said weren't clean enough to come to the temple, because of their occupation.
Who would've ever thought that a boy, not quite on the edge of manhood, would be teaching and challenging the religious leaders?
Who would've thought that the Son of God would provide more alcohol for a party where everyone's already drunk! And not only that, but it would be the good stuff, too! (When Jesus turned the water into wine, it wasn't no Boone's Farm...)
Who would've thought that the Son of God would have so much disdain for the religious leaders, the ones who were supposed to be so in touch with God?
Who would've thought that the Son of God would be walking around healing people, bringing them back to wholeness - physically, spiritually, and communally, instead of following the letter of the Law that separated and ostracized the sick from the rest of the people?
Who would've ever thought that the Messiah wouldn't be focusing on the twelve tribes of Israel anymore. Instead He invested time, a period of His life, in His relationships with twelve men.
Working, eating, sleeping, walking, drinking, healing, traveling, praying, teaching, correcting.
He didn't focus on occupation, or on their stations in life; He was teaching them the Kingdom of God.
And then, who would've thought that the Son of God would lay down his life for us.
Not just to show his love for us, it's deeper than that. Yes, He showed His love. If you don't believe me, read the prayers of Jesus in John 17.
Yes, it's deeper, bigger than just "love". A greater redemption story is at work here, playing out over and over, time and time again.
Back to today.
Christmas has come and gone. The Savior has been born. And with Him, hope has been born as well.
Do we know what this looks like? I guarantee, it's probably not what we expect, because the spiritual landscape is changing; just as it changed when Christianity was brand new.
We can't see it, because we're in it, we're part of it.
Christ came to restore us to the relationship we had with God back in the Garden of Eden. Walking in the cool of the day, side by side with God. Walking, talking, living, tending, learning, correcting... sound familiar?
The new year arrives, and when it does, we put the past behind us. We let go of the mistakes of the last 365 days, with the hope that the next 365 will be better.
With every new year, our resolutions burst forth: to make new changes, to improve ourselves, to make something better in or around us. The new year brings hope that swirls around us, fills us, and inspires us.
What trips us up in all our new year's resolutions is faith. Or maybe, it's our inability to incorporate faith into them...
You see, faith is messy. It is sticky, it is hard, and it is ever changing.
We don't know what to do with it, because it's a gift that's been given, without directions. And because there's no "blanket instructions", we don't know how to use this gift, or even know why it's a gift.
We don't know what to do with it, because it doesn't originate in us; it's planted there, like a seed, by the gift-giver. And it has been given to us under the often-forgotten directions that we have to seek the giver, in order to seek the directions.
The gift itself, and the nature of the gift, necessitates we do this, not just once upon receiving the gift (touchdown!), or once a week, but day after day after day. After all, Adam didn't just walk in the garden with God on Sundays...
And what we end up learning is that the "gift" is really building a relationship with the Giver; as it turns out, the gift IS the relationship between you and the Giver. And as the relationship develops, the gift, the present, turns into the Presence.
Without that relationship, we're just little kids running around with a shiny new toy; a present that we don't know how to use, we don't know how it works, and don't know how to explain it to others.
And what do kids do in that situation? Someone gets an idea, shares it, and all of a sudden, everyone's doing the same thing with their gift.
(This might also sound familiar.)
Here's the beauty of it... not one of us is the same, and yet, we've all received this perfect gift, one that's tailor-made for each of us. The faith that I have is not even remotely close to the faith that my husband has. Or that you have. The gift each of us has been given has everything to do with who God designed us to be.
AND THAT IS NOT THE SAME PERSON!!!
Think of faith as a pair of jeans. Super weird example, I know. But follow me for a minute.
We all know that each of us has a favorite pair of jeans. They fit just right, they make you feel good, they make you comfortable, and they're useful. Like they were made...just for you!
Ladies, have you ever tried to wear men's jeans? They just don't fit! They're too big in the waist, too tight across the hips, and not enough room to move in the legs.
Men, I'm not even asking.
Even though there are millions of different pairs of jeans out there, we find the ones that fit us. Our shape, our style, our purposes.
The same goes for faith. My relationship with God, my faith, is different than yours. As it should be.
In order to accomplish all God has for us, since one person can't do it all (nor were we designed to do it all - hence "community"), we need to be different.
Think about it.
If the Body of Christ was made up only of hands, we'd never go anywhere.
If the Body didn't have a spine, how would we be able to stand in the face of persecution?
And, if the Body didn't have a butt, we'd never be able to get rid of our... "Kakos"!
With the hope of something new being brought forth, just like a new year, or just like a baby in a manger, hold firm in the faith He's given you, and know that God is up to something.
Sometimes that's hard. My God, I know this. Our human instinct is to fight change, to hang on to the familiar. But when we do that, we're no longer paying attention to the relationship, and we're hanging onto the religion. The results are blinding; just ask the apostle Paul.
If we remove the cumbersome goggles of our own rules, expectations, and experiences of what we think God could, would, can or will do, we might just be able to see what He IS doing.
If we say that God can only move in one particular way, or that the Holy Spirit only does this, or only does that, we'd only be showing that our minds are closed, and would separate us further from those who don't experience God that way, or even worse, don't know what it's like to experience God at all. How can we say that something is good or not good, when the lens we're looking through is limited by our own experiences?
For example. If a pastor doesn't "move mountains" when they speak, or they don't take on what we think are the "appropriate tonal fluctuations" when they're delivering a message, it doesn't mean they're operating outside of the Spirit of God.
All this does is openly display the religion in our life, and blind us to what's going on around us.
So let's remove the glasses of all we have experienced "church" to be, and just for a few moments, imagine what the church could possibly look like. This may sound completely unfathomable at this moment, but when Jesus came, He shook the world on its head.
Could it possibly be that the days of the attitude of the "pastor-knows-all" may be coming to a close? With information at our fingertips 24 hours a day, ancient writings accessible electronically, and still, the temple curtain remains torn between God and ALL His people, it is quite possible for everyday regular people to have access to the same information as the pastor.
What could this mean??
That the people can minister to one another, can pray for one another, can bless one another, heal one another, and teach one another. We can support one another, we can feed one another, we can nurture one another, and we can encourage one another.
If you think about it, it sounds a little bit like the Acts church. Acts 2: 42-47 says this:
"The believers devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, to the community, to the shared meals, and to their prayers. A sense of awe came over everyone. God performed many wonders and signs through the apostles. All the believers were united and shared everything. They would sell pieces of property and possessions and distribute the proceeds to everyone who needed them. Every day, they met together in the temple and ate in their homes. They shared food with gladness and simplicity. They praised God and demonstrated God's goodness to everyone. The Lord added daily to the community those who were being saved."
Acts 4:32-34 says this: "The community of believers was one in heart and mind. None of them would say, "This is mine!" about any of their possessions, but held everything in common. The apostles continued to bear powerful witness to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and an abundance of grace was at work among them. There was no needy persons among them."
And isn't it interesting that in Luke 10 and Mark 6, Jesus sends His disciples out in twos...
Sure, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal when we read it, but when we see it, when we experience it... It sure brings a new intensity to the message, a new understanding, and a new level of authority, doesn't it??
Imagine if the overall attitude of the church was Love first.
We use the scripture out of Mark 10:9 all the time as our affirmation of marriage, or our justification against divorce. "Therefore, humans must not pull apart what God has put together."
But just listen to what it says there. We don't even have to read between the lines!
God has put (us) together.
He is calling us into community with Him, and into community with one another.
Ever heard the saying, 'There's strength in numbers'?
Try to grasp, just for a moment, the immensity of the truth that every single one of us, inside and outside the church, is here for a reason...
Every.
Single.
One.
Of.
Us.
It's time we stopped using fear as a reason to separate ourselves from people who are different than we are. God is putting us together, out of His love for us. And it's our love for Him, that flows out to one another.
Great Love is shown when the desire to be connected to one another exceeds the desire to be correct.
What if church happened wherever we went?
Instead of being hung up on our fears, or our judgments, or our own priorities, what if we were so zeroed in to what God is up to in each situation, in each moment, that lives are changed wherever we go?
That our disbelief is cast aside, and in it's place stands fearlessness.
Imagine if we stopped judging one another for our failures, addressed the hurts we've all experienced, validated one another, linked arms and walked into healing together.
What would it look like if we used our God-given creative abilities to develop solutions to the problems that people face, like poverty, hunger and disease? I saw a commercial this morning that said 1 in 4 children in North Carolina live in poverty. What if we tapped into the power and reality of Heaven to remedy this!?
I'm telling you - God is doing this now!!
It's not just happening in this church, or the church down the street. It's not just happening in one denomination. It's not just happening overseas.
Expand your perspective a little bit...
It's happening at jobsites; it's happening at grocery stores; it's happening in neighborhood gatherings, kitchen tables, traffic jams, bus stops, public schools, and all kinds of places and situations we'd normally think to be regular or "unholy".
He's doing this all over the world!!!
We have a tendency, as human beings, to look around us and think that the world is burning to the ground, falling apart, or whatever terms we use to say "it's not looking so good".
Keep in mind, when Jesus was born, the Israelites thought the same thing about the world around them, too.
*Here's a secret: It's always going to look that way if you don't have your eyes on Christ.
The game has changed. Christ is our Vision. And He is not limited to only where we think He is. He is not hindered in any way, shape or form by our human restrictions and limitations.
I can almost guarantee that He is going to be in all the places we least expect Him; that He'll say what we don't expect Him to say, and He's already shown that He's doing what we don't expect Him to do!
And whether we like it or not, He's ushering in His Kingdom.
Please. Do not limit yourselves by what we've always been taught, or the way things have always been done.
Listen to what He's telling you now, today and tomorrow.
And step into a future more beautiful than you've ever imagined, catching glimpses of Heaven along the way.
(Right at the beginning of a new year, I might add.)
For the last two weeks, I've been flooded from all sides with hope, with possibility, and with a vision for a future that looks so much brighter than I ever thought possible.
Even in the midst of rapid changes all around us, and the 'not-knowing-what's-shaking-out', I still sense an incredible hope.
My outlook on life causes me to embrace change, to almost look forward to it.
In order to survive the sometimes crushing strife that change can bring, I have to seek God.
Sometimes, when seeking Him, He gives me glimpses of what He's doing, in order to understand why things are happening the way they are. He broadens my perspective beyond my own little slice of existence.
Here we sit, it's after Christmas and into the new year.
We just celebrated the birth of our Savior. I'm still wrapping my head around all that entails, especially for today. In order to do that, I have to look at the Christmas story through my own eyes.
The prophets knew that the Messiah was coming. But it was only Mary and Joseph that knew the baby Mary carried was the Christ.
Imagine this, if you will:
The baby you carry is the prophesied and long awaited Messiah. The one destined to save Israel, as the religious leaders have taught for centuries. (Just like we teach the second coming of Christ today...)
This would normally be something celebrated, just as we celebrate the news of a new baby today.
But, there is a scandal. You have not yet married the man you're engaged to.
(And remember, pre-marital 'relations' in this culture could be a death sentence.)
So here you are, pregnant. Pregnant not by your husband, or even by your fiance, but pregnant by God.
(No one's going to believe this, as it is. But it gets better...)
And, to top it off, you're pregnant, and the child you carry is the Son of God! The one promised, the one long awaited by the entire nation.
And you can't tell a soul...
I can only imagine the conversations that Mary & Joseph have. You know, after that first awkward one...
They knew the teachings, they know that things were going to be different from then on out. But I don't think they had any idea what that would look like.
I'm sure that during her pregnancy Mary and Joseph, if they were anything like any other couple expecting a child, they were filled with hopes and dreams already.
The hope that a child brings is endless. The faith that takes over when a pregnancy occurs is often unnoticed, but it is the fuel for visions of the future, and the endless, endless possibilities.
Now, add on to those hopes and dreams, the knowledge that your child is the Christ-child. The Messiah. The one to save your nation.
We all dream greatness for our children, don't we. But to know? That would fuel all kinds of fantastic dreams, wouldn't it?
So the baby comes.
For those who've had children, it's never at a convenient time, is it? (I remember when my mom went into labor with my brother, our entire family was camping... Two hours away from the hospital.)
Mary and Joseph aren't at home, thanks to the census; they end up in the only shelter they can find, so she can deliver the baby. Not a hospital, not a doctor or midwife's office. Not even a hotel. Scripture puts them in a barn; a shepherd's shelter.
A barn doesn't even sound that far-fetched, because we think of the barns we've seen our entire lives.
In all actuality, the shelter the holy family ended up in was a cave, a rocky cutout on the side of a hill.
Everything about this story leads me to believe that nothing about this was turning out as Mary and Joseph planned, or expected.
I wonder if they paid that any mind.
As the life of Jesus progresses, we see more and more of the unexpected.
Who would've thought that this baby, God-with-us, would shatter the barriers between clean and unclean right out of the gate (or womb, if you will), and that the first ones to come worship Him were the very ones that the Jewish religion said weren't clean enough to come to the temple, because of their occupation.
Who would've ever thought that a boy, not quite on the edge of manhood, would be teaching and challenging the religious leaders?
Who would've thought that the Son of God would provide more alcohol for a party where everyone's already drunk! And not only that, but it would be the good stuff, too! (When Jesus turned the water into wine, it wasn't no Boone's Farm...)
Who would've thought that the Son of God would have so much disdain for the religious leaders, the ones who were supposed to be so in touch with God?
Who would've thought that the Son of God would be walking around healing people, bringing them back to wholeness - physically, spiritually, and communally, instead of following the letter of the Law that separated and ostracized the sick from the rest of the people?
Who would've ever thought that the Messiah wouldn't be focusing on the twelve tribes of Israel anymore. Instead He invested time, a period of His life, in His relationships with twelve men.
Working, eating, sleeping, walking, drinking, healing, traveling, praying, teaching, correcting.
He didn't focus on occupation, or on their stations in life; He was teaching them the Kingdom of God.
And then, who would've thought that the Son of God would lay down his life for us.
Not just to show his love for us, it's deeper than that. Yes, He showed His love. If you don't believe me, read the prayers of Jesus in John 17.
Yes, it's deeper, bigger than just "love". A greater redemption story is at work here, playing out over and over, time and time again.
Back to today.
Christmas has come and gone. The Savior has been born. And with Him, hope has been born as well.
Do we know what this looks like? I guarantee, it's probably not what we expect, because the spiritual landscape is changing; just as it changed when Christianity was brand new.
We can't see it, because we're in it, we're part of it.
Christ came to restore us to the relationship we had with God back in the Garden of Eden. Walking in the cool of the day, side by side with God. Walking, talking, living, tending, learning, correcting... sound familiar?
The new year arrives, and when it does, we put the past behind us. We let go of the mistakes of the last 365 days, with the hope that the next 365 will be better.
With every new year, our resolutions burst forth: to make new changes, to improve ourselves, to make something better in or around us. The new year brings hope that swirls around us, fills us, and inspires us.
What trips us up in all our new year's resolutions is faith. Or maybe, it's our inability to incorporate faith into them...
You see, faith is messy. It is sticky, it is hard, and it is ever changing.
We don't know what to do with it, because it's a gift that's been given, without directions. And because there's no "blanket instructions", we don't know how to use this gift, or even know why it's a gift.
We don't know what to do with it, because it doesn't originate in us; it's planted there, like a seed, by the gift-giver. And it has been given to us under the often-forgotten directions that we have to seek the giver, in order to seek the directions.
The gift itself, and the nature of the gift, necessitates we do this, not just once upon receiving the gift (touchdown!), or once a week, but day after day after day. After all, Adam didn't just walk in the garden with God on Sundays...
And what we end up learning is that the "gift" is really building a relationship with the Giver; as it turns out, the gift IS the relationship between you and the Giver. And as the relationship develops, the gift, the present, turns into the Presence.
Without that relationship, we're just little kids running around with a shiny new toy; a present that we don't know how to use, we don't know how it works, and don't know how to explain it to others.
And what do kids do in that situation? Someone gets an idea, shares it, and all of a sudden, everyone's doing the same thing with their gift.
(This might also sound familiar.)
Here's the beauty of it... not one of us is the same, and yet, we've all received this perfect gift, one that's tailor-made for each of us. The faith that I have is not even remotely close to the faith that my husband has. Or that you have. The gift each of us has been given has everything to do with who God designed us to be.
AND THAT IS NOT THE SAME PERSON!!!
Think of faith as a pair of jeans. Super weird example, I know. But follow me for a minute.
We all know that each of us has a favorite pair of jeans. They fit just right, they make you feel good, they make you comfortable, and they're useful. Like they were made...just for you!
Ladies, have you ever tried to wear men's jeans? They just don't fit! They're too big in the waist, too tight across the hips, and not enough room to move in the legs.
Men, I'm not even asking.
Even though there are millions of different pairs of jeans out there, we find the ones that fit us. Our shape, our style, our purposes.
The same goes for faith. My relationship with God, my faith, is different than yours. As it should be.
In order to accomplish all God has for us, since one person can't do it all (nor were we designed to do it all - hence "community"), we need to be different.
Think about it.
If the Body of Christ was made up only of hands, we'd never go anywhere.
If the Body didn't have a spine, how would we be able to stand in the face of persecution?
And, if the Body didn't have a butt, we'd never be able to get rid of our... "Kakos"!
With the hope of something new being brought forth, just like a new year, or just like a baby in a manger, hold firm in the faith He's given you, and know that God is up to something.
Sometimes that's hard. My God, I know this. Our human instinct is to fight change, to hang on to the familiar. But when we do that, we're no longer paying attention to the relationship, and we're hanging onto the religion. The results are blinding; just ask the apostle Paul.
If we remove the cumbersome goggles of our own rules, expectations, and experiences of what we think God could, would, can or will do, we might just be able to see what He IS doing.
If we say that God can only move in one particular way, or that the Holy Spirit only does this, or only does that, we'd only be showing that our minds are closed, and would separate us further from those who don't experience God that way, or even worse, don't know what it's like to experience God at all. How can we say that something is good or not good, when the lens we're looking through is limited by our own experiences?
For example. If a pastor doesn't "move mountains" when they speak, or they don't take on what we think are the "appropriate tonal fluctuations" when they're delivering a message, it doesn't mean they're operating outside of the Spirit of God.
All this does is openly display the religion in our life, and blind us to what's going on around us.
So let's remove the glasses of all we have experienced "church" to be, and just for a few moments, imagine what the church could possibly look like. This may sound completely unfathomable at this moment, but when Jesus came, He shook the world on its head.
Could it possibly be that the days of the attitude of the "pastor-knows-all" may be coming to a close? With information at our fingertips 24 hours a day, ancient writings accessible electronically, and still, the temple curtain remains torn between God and ALL His people, it is quite possible for everyday regular people to have access to the same information as the pastor.
What could this mean??
That the people can minister to one another, can pray for one another, can bless one another, heal one another, and teach one another. We can support one another, we can feed one another, we can nurture one another, and we can encourage one another.
If you think about it, it sounds a little bit like the Acts church. Acts 2: 42-47 says this:
"The believers devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching, to the community, to the shared meals, and to their prayers. A sense of awe came over everyone. God performed many wonders and signs through the apostles. All the believers were united and shared everything. They would sell pieces of property and possessions and distribute the proceeds to everyone who needed them. Every day, they met together in the temple and ate in their homes. They shared food with gladness and simplicity. They praised God and demonstrated God's goodness to everyone. The Lord added daily to the community those who were being saved."
Acts 4:32-34 says this: "The community of believers was one in heart and mind. None of them would say, "This is mine!" about any of their possessions, but held everything in common. The apostles continued to bear powerful witness to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus, and an abundance of grace was at work among them. There was no needy persons among them."
And isn't it interesting that in Luke 10 and Mark 6, Jesus sends His disciples out in twos...
Sure, it doesn't seem like that big of a deal when we read it, but when we see it, when we experience it... It sure brings a new intensity to the message, a new understanding, and a new level of authority, doesn't it??
Imagine if the overall attitude of the church was Love first.
We use the scripture out of Mark 10:9 all the time as our affirmation of marriage, or our justification against divorce. "Therefore, humans must not pull apart what God has put together."
But just listen to what it says there. We don't even have to read between the lines!
God has put (us) together.
He is calling us into community with Him, and into community with one another.
Ever heard the saying, 'There's strength in numbers'?
Try to grasp, just for a moment, the immensity of the truth that every single one of us, inside and outside the church, is here for a reason...
Every.
Single.
One.
Of.
Us.
It's time we stopped using fear as a reason to separate ourselves from people who are different than we are. God is putting us together, out of His love for us. And it's our love for Him, that flows out to one another.
Great Love is shown when the desire to be connected to one another exceeds the desire to be correct.
What if church happened wherever we went?
Instead of being hung up on our fears, or our judgments, or our own priorities, what if we were so zeroed in to what God is up to in each situation, in each moment, that lives are changed wherever we go?
That our disbelief is cast aside, and in it's place stands fearlessness.
Imagine if we stopped judging one another for our failures, addressed the hurts we've all experienced, validated one another, linked arms and walked into healing together.
What would it look like if we used our God-given creative abilities to develop solutions to the problems that people face, like poverty, hunger and disease? I saw a commercial this morning that said 1 in 4 children in North Carolina live in poverty. What if we tapped into the power and reality of Heaven to remedy this!?
I'm telling you - God is doing this now!!
It's not just happening in this church, or the church down the street. It's not just happening in one denomination. It's not just happening overseas.
Expand your perspective a little bit...
It's happening at jobsites; it's happening at grocery stores; it's happening in neighborhood gatherings, kitchen tables, traffic jams, bus stops, public schools, and all kinds of places and situations we'd normally think to be regular or "unholy".
He's doing this all over the world!!!
We have a tendency, as human beings, to look around us and think that the world is burning to the ground, falling apart, or whatever terms we use to say "it's not looking so good".
Keep in mind, when Jesus was born, the Israelites thought the same thing about the world around them, too.
*Here's a secret: It's always going to look that way if you don't have your eyes on Christ.
The game has changed. Christ is our Vision. And He is not limited to only where we think He is. He is not hindered in any way, shape or form by our human restrictions and limitations.
I can almost guarantee that He is going to be in all the places we least expect Him; that He'll say what we don't expect Him to say, and He's already shown that He's doing what we don't expect Him to do!
And whether we like it or not, He's ushering in His Kingdom.
Please. Do not limit yourselves by what we've always been taught, or the way things have always been done.
Listen to what He's telling you now, today and tomorrow.
And step into a future more beautiful than you've ever imagined, catching glimpses of Heaven along the way.
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Death
I think I'm about to throw up.
I've felt this way all day. Today is decision day.
Do we follow God, or do we declare ourselves god.
God P L E A S E make yourself real to them.
I'm unable to empathize, or even sympathize with them. I cannot put myself in their shoes, to understand how they could possibly be turning their back on this new thing.
Heartbreaking. The chill in the air causes me to shiver, concealing the trembling.
************************
Flashback a few weeks:
There seems to be, in my own mind especially, a battle between church as we know it, and this new thing God's doing...
...perceived or not, denied or not, there's something shaking down in the deeps of the Body of Christ.
Certain statements and blanket comments and old-fashioned attitudes set off battles in my spirit, setting my neurons and my adrenaline levels into overdrive.
For example, recently someone asked a seemingly innocent question, about what if nasty weather had kept Mary and Joseph at home when Jesus was about to be born, obviously referring to nasty weather keeping people from church (building).
Innocent enough, sure.
Add in context, and it's not so any longer. I'll spare that detail.
Now, take into account the weather on the morning the question was presented: freezing cold, wet, rainy, patches of slick ice on the roads.
I put my myself into the mindset of the masses for a brief moment, and answer the question. "...Oh, you're right. How would I be displaying faith if I let the bad weather keep me home?" Or something like that.
As if our faithfulness is measured by our church attendance...
I know that there are church-goers everywhere who attend a church (building) every Sunday, without fail, (& scoff at those who don't, but that's besides the point).
Many believe, as they were taught by the 'faithful' before them, that your church attendance and the activities you're involved in at the church (building) is what shows your faithfulness.
Sadly, our church (building) attendance doesn't show how faithful we are, it shows how habitual we are.
*************************
Driving home one night, I pass by all the beautiful homes and farms on the main roads. Decades of hard work have yielded the results I can see on this bright moonlit night.
I pass church (building) after church (building), some big, some small. Being part of a small church (building) myself, I understand to some human degree the mindset of the people in these communities who attend these churches (buildings). Self-preservation, work ethic, and a strong sense of "I worked for it", for lack of a better term, are common attitudes accepted and live by here.
Off the beaten, well-worn main roads, I pass by the side roads that are notorious for their drug activity, and the seemingly shady activities that have been known to occur there under the shadows of night.
Right on the corner, a church (building).
As I make the connection in my mind, I wonder what is is about the passing paradigm that keeps the people of the church (building) from reaching the people in these nefarious neighborhoods, keeping them separated.
As I'm wondering this, the angle of the moonlight illuminates row after row of headstones in the cemetery on the corner.
The irony is not lost on me.
**************************
I struggle with my church (building). One-on-one with the people is no problem for me. Loving my neighbor isn't as much of a struggle as I thought it would be. (Turns out, I'm a people person.) I've been humbled many times, and been told by God to bite my tongue enough times to learn to listen. Really listen.
And in that listening, God's showing me that this particular body of believers is very much representative of how the un-churched world sees the church -as a whole.
When we're gathered together on Sunday mornings, we've started to idolize the building, and the people who attended the church (building) before us. We honor "God's house", careful not to take food or drinks into the sanctuary, because, after all, that's God's pew, and doggone-it, you're gonna respect God's stuff.
But we have no problem rolling our eyes at the person giving a testimony, and we have no problem letting everyone know our disgust at the people who are different from us. Or that the pastor went past noon again.
Or using disgusting and derogatory words for people when we think no one's listening. We have no problem spending money on something to put our names on, while people in our own congregation are going hungry.
*************************
The Truth hurts. No matter who delivers it, what form it comes in.
It causes us to finally pay attention to the true justice we know deep down in our souls, but are either taught to ignore, or just flat-out choose to ignore, based on the amount of discomfort it causes.
Even worse, and more devastating than that, is when we ignore the Truth for what we've always done.
The Truth causes us to examine who we are, with all of our character flaws, our imperfections.
In the face of Truth, do we let it transform us, or do we turn our backs on it, and remain in our comfortable little lives, oblivious to the moves of Heaven, and our part in it?
*************************
Where He goes, I will follow.
I've felt this way all day. Today is decision day.
Do we follow God, or do we declare ourselves god.
God P L E A S E make yourself real to them.
I'm unable to empathize, or even sympathize with them. I cannot put myself in their shoes, to understand how they could possibly be turning their back on this new thing.
Heartbreaking. The chill in the air causes me to shiver, concealing the trembling.
************************
Flashback a few weeks:
There seems to be, in my own mind especially, a battle between church as we know it, and this new thing God's doing...
...perceived or not, denied or not, there's something shaking down in the deeps of the Body of Christ.
Certain statements and blanket comments and old-fashioned attitudes set off battles in my spirit, setting my neurons and my adrenaline levels into overdrive.
For example, recently someone asked a seemingly innocent question, about what if nasty weather had kept Mary and Joseph at home when Jesus was about to be born, obviously referring to nasty weather keeping people from church (building).
Innocent enough, sure.
Add in context, and it's not so any longer. I'll spare that detail.
Now, take into account the weather on the morning the question was presented: freezing cold, wet, rainy, patches of slick ice on the roads.
I put my myself into the mindset of the masses for a brief moment, and answer the question. "...Oh, you're right. How would I be displaying faith if I let the bad weather keep me home?" Or something like that.
As if our faithfulness is measured by our church attendance...
I know that there are church-goers everywhere who attend a church (building) every Sunday, without fail, (& scoff at those who don't, but that's besides the point).
Many believe, as they were taught by the 'faithful' before them, that your church attendance and the activities you're involved in at the church (building) is what shows your faithfulness.
Sadly, our church (building) attendance doesn't show how faithful we are, it shows how habitual we are.
*************************
Driving home one night, I pass by all the beautiful homes and farms on the main roads. Decades of hard work have yielded the results I can see on this bright moonlit night.
I pass church (building) after church (building), some big, some small. Being part of a small church (building) myself, I understand to some human degree the mindset of the people in these communities who attend these churches (buildings). Self-preservation, work ethic, and a strong sense of "I worked for it", for lack of a better term, are common attitudes accepted and live by here.
Off the beaten, well-worn main roads, I pass by the side roads that are notorious for their drug activity, and the seemingly shady activities that have been known to occur there under the shadows of night.
Right on the corner, a church (building).
As I make the connection in my mind, I wonder what is is about the passing paradigm that keeps the people of the church (building) from reaching the people in these nefarious neighborhoods, keeping them separated.
As I'm wondering this, the angle of the moonlight illuminates row after row of headstones in the cemetery on the corner.
The irony is not lost on me.
**************************
I struggle with my church (building). One-on-one with the people is no problem for me. Loving my neighbor isn't as much of a struggle as I thought it would be. (Turns out, I'm a people person.) I've been humbled many times, and been told by God to bite my tongue enough times to learn to listen. Really listen.
And in that listening, God's showing me that this particular body of believers is very much representative of how the un-churched world sees the church -as a whole.
When we're gathered together on Sunday mornings, we've started to idolize the building, and the people who attended the church (building) before us. We honor "God's house", careful not to take food or drinks into the sanctuary, because, after all, that's God's pew, and doggone-it, you're gonna respect God's stuff.
But we have no problem rolling our eyes at the person giving a testimony, and we have no problem letting everyone know our disgust at the people who are different from us. Or that the pastor went past noon again.
Or using disgusting and derogatory words for people when we think no one's listening. We have no problem spending money on something to put our names on, while people in our own congregation are going hungry.
*************************
The Truth hurts. No matter who delivers it, what form it comes in.
It causes us to finally pay attention to the true justice we know deep down in our souls, but are either taught to ignore, or just flat-out choose to ignore, based on the amount of discomfort it causes.
Even worse, and more devastating than that, is when we ignore the Truth for what we've always done.
The Truth causes us to examine who we are, with all of our character flaws, our imperfections.
In the face of Truth, do we let it transform us, or do we turn our backs on it, and remain in our comfortable little lives, oblivious to the moves of Heaven, and our part in it?
*************************
Where He goes, I will follow.
Sunday, December 8, 2013
Change
I sit in my newly rearranged living room, awaiting the onslaught of impending Christmas decorations, with my to-do list in front of me.
And no desire whatsoever to get off my rump and get it done.
I am in desperate need of time to process everything that's going on, time to stop and just listen... listen to anything God is saying to me right now.
I seem to be caught in the whirlwind of everything changing, in what seems like every direction, all at once.
Things I took for granted as being safe and stable in the past, aren't appearing so anymore.
Not that I don't want certain things to change, I've just never thought of these things as... "change-able". I'd never put any conscious mental effort towards the possibility of these things being different.
In other words, I wasn't thinking too far into the future.
What I DO know, is that God is turning a corner. He's doing the unexpected, in unexpected ways, and the only way we can tell is that nothing is comfortable anymore.
Church isn't comfortable any more. (And for many, church has never been comfortable.)
Invitations have been laid on the table, decisions need to be made.
Discipleship, when intentional, feels like a brutal, double-fisted conversation with a brick wall. It's the un-intentionality that's proving to be most effective. And, it's in the unintentional discipleship that I'm being held accountable to what I teach, what I say, and what I live.
What I'm finding is the incredible grace that lives in that space between accountability and the humbling.
Work is changing.
(Hell, the fact that I'm working is enough to confirm that...)
Responsibilities are increasing, as well as the intensity of the relationships.
I've become very close to a few of the women at work, women who are teaching me as much about human nature, the heart of God, and the grace that connects them, as I hoped I could bring to anyone else.
These are women who display & live in a grace I couldn't fathom; as their lives and experiences are very different than mine. I don't even know if they're aware of just how much I see the divine working in them, through them:
not returning hate with hate...
giving sacrificially to the unknown, unexpectedly....
forgiveness...
unmerited understanding...
I am humbled into a silence of admiration. These aren't "church folks".
I'm having to adjust the way I learn, for even now, that's changing too.
I'm having to use my thinker pro-actively now. I should've known; for years I've been under the instruction of incredible teachers, who've taught me that learning is a 2-way street - it involves my comprehension and mental application to information brought forth. (Not just memorization) The way I process it is dictated by who I am, the life and experiences I've had, and who I'm called to Be.
If I don't take the information I've learned and make it personal, or process it into something my brain understands through the filter called "my life", well, then I sound like a regurgitating robot, who has NO idea how to utilize what I've been given, whether it's for myself or for others.
And then, frankly, I'd sound like so many other Christians I've come into contact with, reciting Christian platitudes, yet living completely opposite to all the ways that Christ told us to live.
I'm processing this crash-course God's got me on right now.
How He's teaching and clarifying things in my intimate relationships, usually not until I've screwed something up, then confessing my lack of ability to do any of it apart from Him.
I'm seeing an increase in the number of Christian organizations, of every kind, being exposed for their (dark) religiosities, their hypocrisies.
I can see doctrines- formed out of fear, or the desire to control or correct- utilizing the mis-translations and misinterpretations of Scripture as their goalposts. It's created nothing but a culture of ignorance; spoon-fed baby food, barely satisfying the bone- and soul-deep desire to know and understand more.
And, like a baby, when we cry out for more, we get another spoonful of baby food.
It doesn't satisfy us, but it shuts us up.
One of the problems with this, is that if everyone's getting the same food, (just different flavors) then we're not getting what we need to G.R.O.W.
We're not growing up in our faith, because we've learned to rely on the regularly scheduled feedings.
This is why, after generations of increasing spoon-feedings, we're now living in a spiritually impotent "Christian" sub-culture, who's closest connection to Christ is the name we call ourselves.
So, after all this has been spoken and chewed on, I ponder this new insight as the Christmas season approaches.
God so loved the world (the people of the world) that He gave His only Son...
LOVE.
Hypocrisy cannot exist where Love is...
Love crushes all religion's rules and standards...
And now, FINALLY, I'm excited to see what's coming around the bend.
And no desire whatsoever to get off my rump and get it done.
I am in desperate need of time to process everything that's going on, time to stop and just listen... listen to anything God is saying to me right now.
I seem to be caught in the whirlwind of everything changing, in what seems like every direction, all at once.
Things I took for granted as being safe and stable in the past, aren't appearing so anymore.
Not that I don't want certain things to change, I've just never thought of these things as... "change-able". I'd never put any conscious mental effort towards the possibility of these things being different.
In other words, I wasn't thinking too far into the future.
What I DO know, is that God is turning a corner. He's doing the unexpected, in unexpected ways, and the only way we can tell is that nothing is comfortable anymore.
Church isn't comfortable any more. (And for many, church has never been comfortable.)
Invitations have been laid on the table, decisions need to be made.
Discipleship, when intentional, feels like a brutal, double-fisted conversation with a brick wall. It's the un-intentionality that's proving to be most effective. And, it's in the unintentional discipleship that I'm being held accountable to what I teach, what I say, and what I live.
What I'm finding is the incredible grace that lives in that space between accountability and the humbling.
Work is changing.
(Hell, the fact that I'm working is enough to confirm that...)
Responsibilities are increasing, as well as the intensity of the relationships.
I've become very close to a few of the women at work, women who are teaching me as much about human nature, the heart of God, and the grace that connects them, as I hoped I could bring to anyone else.
These are women who display & live in a grace I couldn't fathom; as their lives and experiences are very different than mine. I don't even know if they're aware of just how much I see the divine working in them, through them:
not returning hate with hate...
giving sacrificially to the unknown, unexpectedly....
forgiveness...
unmerited understanding...
I am humbled into a silence of admiration. These aren't "church folks".
I'm having to adjust the way I learn, for even now, that's changing too.
I'm having to use my thinker pro-actively now. I should've known; for years I've been under the instruction of incredible teachers, who've taught me that learning is a 2-way street - it involves my comprehension and mental application to information brought forth. (Not just memorization) The way I process it is dictated by who I am, the life and experiences I've had, and who I'm called to Be.
If I don't take the information I've learned and make it personal, or process it into something my brain understands through the filter called "my life", well, then I sound like a regurgitating robot, who has NO idea how to utilize what I've been given, whether it's for myself or for others.
And then, frankly, I'd sound like so many other Christians I've come into contact with, reciting Christian platitudes, yet living completely opposite to all the ways that Christ told us to live.
I'm processing this crash-course God's got me on right now.
How He's teaching and clarifying things in my intimate relationships, usually not until I've screwed something up, then confessing my lack of ability to do any of it apart from Him.
I'm seeing an increase in the number of Christian organizations, of every kind, being exposed for their (dark) religiosities, their hypocrisies.
I can see doctrines- formed out of fear, or the desire to control or correct- utilizing the mis-translations and misinterpretations of Scripture as their goalposts. It's created nothing but a culture of ignorance; spoon-fed baby food, barely satisfying the bone- and soul-deep desire to know and understand more.
And, like a baby, when we cry out for more, we get another spoonful of baby food.
It doesn't satisfy us, but it shuts us up.
One of the problems with this, is that if everyone's getting the same food, (just different flavors) then we're not getting what we need to G.R.O.W.
We're not growing up in our faith, because we've learned to rely on the regularly scheduled feedings.
This is why, after generations of increasing spoon-feedings, we're now living in a spiritually impotent "Christian" sub-culture, who's closest connection to Christ is the name we call ourselves.
So, after all this has been spoken and chewed on, I ponder this new insight as the Christmas season approaches.
God so loved the world (the people of the world) that He gave His only Son...
LOVE.
Hypocrisy cannot exist where Love is...
Love crushes all religion's rules and standards...
And now, FINALLY, I'm excited to see what's coming around the bend.
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